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Revealed my infidelity: now what do I do?

“I revealed my infidelity; now what do I do?” If you’d like to preserve the relationship, here’s the short answer: continue to apologize for what you truly regret, don’t tolerate yelling, mistreatment, or real abuse as a response from your partner, and get help from a specialist, not just a “couples counselor.” I’ll say more […]

How to Recover after Infidelity

Being the Best Client During Treatment How you recover after infidelity depends almost entirely on being the right kind of client during treatment. I’ll explain what I mean. This quote applies: “Your wound is probably not your fault; but your healing is your responsibility.” Especially after infidelity, this concept can be a tough one to […]

Affair Recovery is Possible

When people discover an affair or decide to come clean, they often ask “Is affair recovery even possible?” If this is you, don’t pay attention right now to friends, family, social media, or the internet on this one. There are a million negative opinions and they all spout off without any real wisdom on the […]

Thinking through your Solution

Most of us identify strongly with our own thinking and intelligence, so it can be natural to trust your brain to figure it all out. If you could just “get to the bottom of it” or “understand why this happened” you’d have your answer and solution, right? Well, unfortunately, no. Psssst, here’s a secret: there […]

Heal After Heartbreak

If you’ve been trying to heal after heartbreak due to a post-COVID breakup, you are not alone. While many people stayed together in 2020, the fall of 2021 saw a significant shift as many couples decided to call it quits. That’s left a number of people struggling to heal. You’ve probably experienced heartbreak before, but […]

Getting Needs Met

Whether in life generally or in relationship specifically, getting your needs met can be tricky. Some people go about this by being demanding. (Aggressive.) Others are quiet. (Passive.) Some pretend to be content while there’s seething anger and resentment below the surface. (Passive Aggressive.) Sometimes others just “take the bull by the horns” and go […]

Grieve Actively

Learning to grieve actively is one of the best skills you’ll ever need. It might seem morbid, but none of us escape life without significant loss. Yes, even you, young grasshopper. I remember, at 23, studying the life span of long-term marriage and getting to the midlife or “third stage.” One of the “processes” of […]

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