Some clients come to me for expert relationship help feeling already defeated, sensing this is their last-ditch effort. They’ve tried everything else. That puzzles me sometimes. Why did they wait so long? How did they let it get this bad? And yet, I get it. I spent years and years trying real hard, endeavoring to […]
Losers Fight
Losers fight and fighters always lose. When it comes to intimate partnership, fighting means you both lose. There’s no losing the battle but winning the war. If there’s a war, you lose, my friend. Period. Fighting achieves exactly nothing. Did you know research clearly shows that debate is not effective in changing others’ perspectives, convincing […]
Therapy relationship working?
How’s the therapy relationship treating you these days? Maybe you’ve been seeing your therapist for a while now, and lately you’re wondering if you should scale back or if it’s time to say goodbye for good. How do you know? She’s probably “really nice” so breaking up can be hard to do. There’s a good […]
Three Things that will Hinder your Therapy
Considering therapy? Honestly, I AM biased. I do believe we ALL can benefit from time with a good therapist. Getting the perspective of someone who is objective, studies humans for a living, and has the know-how to communicate what they see in a way that will benefit you is, well, just priceless. And finding the […]
Choices and Guilt
Call him an old soul; we do sometimes. What would you give to be free of shame and guilt? I bet you’ve been on a few guilt trips in your lifetime. My son, age 22, speaks precise truths that took me 45 years to learn. The hard way. Well, okay, maybe 40 years. And my […]
Is it time for help?
Only you can determine if now is the time to get professional help (for yourself or a child.) Your doctor, a family member, or a trusted friend might say so. They could be right and it can be helpful to get “outside” feedback from those you trust. Still, we are so accustomed to “doing it […]
Finding your right counselor or life coach
The right counselor or life coach. You’ll invest time, energy, and probably some money finding the right therapist or coach. Timing-when you’re right in the middle of a crisis or need to feel better fast-can make it even more stressful. Don’t worry. Your natural process of selection is at work no matter what. Follow these […]